Some Days

Some days, you just want to crawl back into bed and restart it all over again.  Oh, but
I did that, and it still didn't work.  I woke up with a headache.  I cancelled volunteering because it was killing me and despite taking ibuprofen and trying to go back to bed, it did me no good.  I wasted time laying in bed, trying to go back to sleep.  Not sure if the head ache is caused by lack of sleep or by a new medicine I started this week.  I will wait and see.

So, I thought I would try and be productive.  I started by making some skirts.  I love to sew and we invited the sister missionaries over for Christmas.  What is better than a skirt for them for Christmas.  And while I was at it, I was working on a skirt for Elisabeth and one for me.  The one for Elisabeth had a hole in it.  I need to fix that.  Mine, I thought it was knit fabric, turns out the lace doesn't have much give.  So while a knit skirt would have fit at the size I cut it, the lace didn't  That is okay.  I had enough to make one for my girls, so I will use that part for my big daughter and I re-cut mine.  Not too much of a big deal, but I lost count of how many times I had to re-thread my machine.  Seriously, I must have re-thread it 15 plus times.  I took a break and worked on making candy.  For over 20 years, I have been making my grandma's English Toffee.  It is a family recipe passed down from mother to daughter.  I am not allowed to share it with anyone but my daughters.  I have made it.  Once or twice when I have first moved some where, it has been a little softer than normal, but it has always been toffee.  Today, for the first time ever, I ruined a batch of toffee.  My time and all those ingredients wasted.  The nuts and the chocolate and the butter.  I walked back to my sewing.  Re-threading began again.

Fast forward to kids coming home.  I get into a frustrating discussion with one of my kids.  I know I wasn't at my best.  I was provoking him a bit.  I think I was just tired as was he.  We had both had frustrating days.  So, we didn't quite hit it off.  We finally made up and worked on his homemade Christmas gifts for the family.  A family tradition.  Each person makes homemade gifts for every member of the family.  It takes work, but it puts the focus back on giving rather than receiving.  You should see how excited they each get as they give their gifts to each other on Christmas morning.  We had a great dinner, thanks to my husband.

Then, the big kids and dad went to church.  In an effort to have a peaceful evening, I requested that one kids join dad at church.  Dad suggested that child bring a book.  He burst into tears crying and said, but I wanted to make cookies for mom.  After having a hard time together today, he wanted to make amends by serving and making cookies.  I had told him no at his request twice already.  I told him he would have to make him all by himself.  He was ready.   Then, while I am still working on sewing skirts.  So, I worked on sewing 6 today.  5 are now done.  I should have realized that I needed to be a mom and not so focused on what I was doing.

It was a good thing to do.  But the better thing was to be with my kids.  I didn't quite get that, I see that as I look back now.  He came in and asked questions about his cookies.  I answered.  He did eventually make the cookies all by himself.  I helped with the timer and taking them out.  They were really good.  He was excited to make 4 for each person.  With a family of six, each person usually gets 2.  With only 3 home, he could cook a dozen and we each would get 4.  He was so excited.  And they were good.  Despite my efforts to eat healthy, it was worth it to eat his delicious cookies.

Meanwhile, the youngest was determined to work on her Christmas gift for the family.  Why I suggested sock monkeys. I will never know.  I have obviously never made sock monkeys.  So, I quickly sewed the parts on the machine for her.  And then, I realized how much of it was hand sewn.  Really, it was a lot.  She was so excited about doing it.  She has been wanting to hand sew for a while.  She found my big needle and the thread, and set to work.  After a long break for me to find some stuffing in the house.  Cotton stuffing.  :-)  She stuffed her monkeys and I would get the sewing started and she would sew the parts together.  The good news is that I bought fuzzy socks to make the monkeys out of.  Because those were the striped ones available at the dollar store.  The fuzziness hides any mistakes and they look great.

So, I guess some of my giving independence to my kids paid off tonight.  They both learned new skills.  I was there to watch them.  And to give help.  I could have enjoyed the time with them more.  I am definitely pleased with their work.  I am grateful to say that the big kids project will be pretty independent.  Whew.

A great reminder to me to remember what is most important each day.  My children and who they are and the time I can spend with them.  I love being a mom.

Whiners and Criers are Tired and Need to go to Bed!

One day we were sitting at the table and somehow the topic of what would be on the headstone's when we died.  Together, all the kids said, "Whiners and Criers are tired and need to go to BED!"  would be on mine.  :-)  I don't remember when, but there was a day when I was tired of whiney children who cried way to much.  Over every little thing.  He looked at me wrong.  She smiled at me.  So, when my children whine and cry, I typically smile and say whiners and criers are tired and need to go to bed.  Please try saying that again.  They usually take a breath and come back with a normal talking voice explaining what they wished to say before.  Other times, they get sent straight their rooms.  Often times to bed.
It has worked.  We are not a whine free house, but it is getting better.

Imperfect but I love it

All of my life I dreamed of being a mom. When I was about fourteen I was told I would be successful in my career. I was devastated. I wanted to be a mom. And that wasn't a career in my mind. Several years later I read president Ezra Taft Benson's talk "To the Mother's in Zion." In his talk he talked about the greatest work a woman could ever do would be as that of a mother. I love this talk. It reached to me and told me that my career would be as a mother. Oh how I rejoiced in realizing that I could live up to my career and do what I loved, what I always dreamed of, and what I desired more than anything. This talk is phenomenal. It has shaped who I am and what I prioritize as a mother. He lists ten things we can do as moms to love and nurture our children. They are: be at the crossroads, be a friend, pray, teach them, hold family home evening, read to them, have meals as a family, read scriptures as a family, do things together, and love them. I have been thinking of writing a blog about being a mom. Mostly for me to reminisce and remember what has worked with my children and to let my children grow up and read what worked in our family. I have had a few people ask me what I do to teach my children different things too. So, I thought I would write it all down. I do not do this alone. First, my children are really my father in heavens children. He created them. He knows them. He loves them more than I ever could. I am His daughter and He has blessed me with the children we have. He helps me beyond measure. He knows their thoughts and He helps me know how to help them. Second I married the man of my dreams. He is my knight in shining armor. One of things I had on my list for my ideal future husband was first to love Heavenly Father above all. And second to love children almost as much as I do. I fell in love with him the day we were walking through the grocery store and a little boy called him daddy. He beamed for the rest of the day. That was when I saw his love for children. He is an amazing father. We balance each other out. And most importantly he listens to a loving Heavenly Father. I have fabulous parents. My mom and I talk every day. She is a fabulous mom and a wealth of information. I am grateful for her. My dad is awesome. We talk regularly and he gives great advice. One of my favorites was he was telling me about the dam that broke in Idaho. I tend to over spiritualize everything. The dam broke in Idaho, where there were a number of LDS members. The area was devastated. People lost so much during that disaster. They started to wonder what they had done wrong. Why did this happen to them. A member of the twelve apostles came down to speak with the members. In essence, he told them all that the dam broke because the dam broke. When I try to read too much into things sometimes, I just remind myself that sometimes the dam just breaks. I have great friends with whom I talk and learn from. Of course I have the gospel of Jesus Christ upon whom my life is founded. I think this blog will basically be a what I do and why I do it. Hopefully it will be of benefit to my amazing children.

The picture above is from a frustrating family photo shoot we had this weekend.  After being told that my youngest just wasn't smiling, but rather making a ton of faces, this is what the photographer took of my telling her it was time to smile.  Out of a ton of pictures, over 100, and over 50 family pics, I only liked 3 family pics.  Granted it had rained for a week and a half prior and this was the first time we had really been outside since it had rained.  We ran out before dinner.  So they were hungry and antsy.  I am thankful for the 3.  We have more great pics of individuals and girls and boys and my hubby and I.  My awesome cousin, Sara came over and took the great pictures.  :-)  In truth she is the wife of my first cousin once removed, but I just prefer to call her my cousin.  :-)